"The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship, it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when you discover that someone else believes in you and is willing to trust you with a friendship"  

Ralph Waldo Emerson

TRANSCENDING ATTITUDE TOWARDS SEXUAL ACCEPTANCE

Not that it’s anybody’s business, however there are individuals in our social order that believe that people are suppose to be judge by the amount of people that they bed or sleep with. Some even go as far as judging people walking in the streets as to what type of sexual preference, they are inclined to fall under – Lesbians, Gay, Straight or Bisexual, without knowing anything about them.

This mental perverted social happening has been going on for ages, where women would fall victim to men who distinguish them as mere sexual objects to please their sexual fantasies and sexual edges. Women, were and still are an easy target to such perverted male attitudes toward women.  To this day, young girls are forced to marry older men when they are suppose to attend school and further their education – “Ukuthwala”.   

Take the rape justification that’s been used against Lesbians around South Africa – Corrective Rape. When someone is being raped, there is nothing corrective in the darkness of forcing that someone to spread their legs,  when being gagged, trying to scream for help - when their genetic makeup attracts them to other women of a similar nature and not men.

The troubling part about this, is that there are ‘face-clipped’ individuals who believe that when they don’t see any woman or man walking in the streets with a person of the opposite sex or interacting with a person of the opposite sex openly, publicly, then that person must have some form of handicap in their loin area that prohibit them to perform sexual acts with the opposite sex.
  

Is it right for one to take a glimpse at any individual and form a premise about their sexual affairs, whether be it Lesbian, Gay, Straight or Bisexual? Is it right for one to take a decision to alter any individual’s sexual genetic order preference, by force or form of corrective rape?

Now, the most disturbing flip-of-the-coin about Gay and Lesbian folk  is, knowing that there are people who understand and accept their sexual genetic makeup, without being Gay or Lesbian themselves. They want to impose what comes naturally to them, to people who are hereditarily heterosexual, but have no qualms with sharing, interacting or associating with them. It is called “Transcending Attitude Towards Acceptance”.  

With the difficulty that the world has with the strain of the pandemic of HIV/Aids, people who commit such dehumanising acts, do not have a clue on the iniquity and consequences they will have in creating an imbalance in our society. Clearly these ‘face-clipped’ individuals do not see the whole picture.       

The social order around the world is a multifaceted plethora of different personalities, different mindsets, different attitudes and different genetic makeup, as a result different sexual preferences. However being matured about people, is being able to transcend your attitude towards accepting others for who and what they are – with of cause eradicating abuse in every manner.

Do not be a pervert that creates sexual conclusions about people you’ve never had sex with. At any rate, a society that keep on looking at what goes on in other people’s crouches makes for a sick society.    

WORD TO A NEW SEXUAL ACCEPTANCE REVOLUTION

By Linda Sakazi Thwala    

   

http://www.facebook.com/SAKAZI

MOTHERS THAT ABHOR THEIR OWN

Believe it or not, there are mothers out there who think less of their own children in this world. The hatred is rooted from neglect; no not necessarily from their own parents’ neglect but from unmitigated abandonment from their fathers.

Some children who grow up without their fathers, grow up with a perception that men are a breed of species that are invisible from their lives, besides the uncle or grandfather that untimely pitch in whenever they want to. Hence everything they aspire to have: nurture, love, protection, education and a warm meal every dinner time, will be provided for by their never shaken mother.

However, some mothers never fall victim to post-natal depression but, emit to a much destructive form of depression – mid life crisis. This is when a mother reaches a stage in their middle years of their life and realise that they still want to be little girls, dress up like their own teenage girls and go gallivanting with different men, in the name of fun, forgetting their children’s emotional and mental well being. An unhealthy maternal regress which creates a drift between a mother and her children.        

Mothers are an important foundation to a child’s well being, therefore if a mother fails her own child or children by assuming and emulating childish behavior, just because they have reached a phase in their life where they think that they need a reprieve from their motherly duties. A menopausal dilemma, or not? Some mothers fall into this trap, and create a circle of abuse in their households.

When there is a relationship breakdown between a mother and his child/children’s father the loathing amongst them can burn their child/children's attitude towards life, and can make the mother of the child loathe the very image that was procreated with love. Seemingly forging a space in a woman's heart to get rid of this child/children as soon as possible.        

When this happens an unnecessary verbal, and at times physical altercation between the girlish mother and their teenage or adult child/children leads to the huge family breakdown in many ways than one, which in most cases initiates a lifelong emotional struggle. 

Mother who are jammed in such an emotional imbalance are most liable to spread rumours about their own child/children; be verbally abusive; throw tantrums and call the police without a viable reason; be financially unwilling and nonsupport to their child/children’s needs. Worst scenario – disappear in their child/children’s life.   

Mothers who think less of their child/children, do not know the joy and love that children who are well taken care of and brought up with respect, education – do not know the intuitive wisdom of loving your won and the holistic rewards one will be blanketed when they are wrinkled, frail and need loving nurturing aide.

WORD TO A NEW MOTHERLY LOVE REVOLUTION 

By Linda Sakazi Thwala

THE SELF AND RESPECT

When the self carries its self with respect, it is reflected with perpetual respect, love, humility and honour, from every corner of the universe. Respect is love of, if not thee most enduring pillars of self-love, and self-pride.  It is from this pillar of self-love: respect, that people form high expertise and opinion about another person, which  can be positive or negative.

In today’s social cohesion, people are respected for various kinds of interpersonal relations, whether business related or intimate relationships. However some of these associations are based on a negative pillar of respect – arrogance.

Arrogance is a poison to the self, which leads to a person thinking that they are superior to others in all likely ways in life, therefore no one else matters by crook or trait. Arrogance, in most junctures, leads individuals to committing unremitting crimes against other individuals, nations and humanity. An example would be heads-of-states who believe that because, they were given a mandate to guide their nations, now they have the right to manipulate power and corrupt the whole governing system; which of cause forcibly lead to many of these heads-of-states, facing crimes against humanity.

In many homes around the world, you find that adults are disrespected by their own conceited children. Children who lack, self-love and self-respect - no, not by any means that their parents don’t have respect. It’s the failure to instil respect and self-love that makes children unruly and conceited towards others, which brings an abusive game and shame within the household. Creating an unrelenting circle of abuse of children-to-adults that will filter into our society.

The positive side of respect creates a well rounded individual, that aims to build themselves and others without humiliating, disrespecting or dehumanizing others. Which is the positive filled with all the aspects of self-transcending-love; self-esteem, self-worth, self-consistency, self-love and self-respect.

On the other hand, there is a fine line between narcissism and self-transcending-love which affect the three essentials of self - Mental Exercise, Emotional Exercise, and Physical Exercise. A conceited individual starts off with a decorous façade of success, when in reality they are headed for a humongous calamity overflowing with corruption. In opposition to conceit - an individual with respect starts on a modest path of love, hard work and charity that takes them to a life teeming with abundance and longevity.

Parents need to teach their children to have respect for them, for their household, for themselves and for other people.  A lesson that perpetual respect, love, humility and honour brings endless rewards in their loves, which is not shame but fame.

WORD TO A NEW SELF-RESPECT  REVOLUTION

By Linda Sakazi Thwala