“YOU STRIKE A ROCK!”

A wise woman once uttered enlightening words that reverberated in the spiritual essence of our psychologically battered, male dominated society. This woman was none other than, apartheid activist, Allen Khuzwayo, who in our passive resistance lamented these words: "You strike a woman, you strike a rock!" There are women who are women of immaculate finesse, which in all quintessence, bare the strength of a rock - subsequent to the failure of their marriages or relationships to obsessive controlling, abusive man.

I have witnessed the scourge of abuse at an early age in my life. Today I realize that abusive men are a product of our society, although I do not condone violence in any form, whether verbal, physical or emotional – violent men are forged by our society and this is a matter that needs to be addressed in full effect. We as society play a trumpeting role in influencing and forging the type of man that society will look up to in the future. We need to find the cause-and-effect of why a particular man turns into an abusive beast.

Young men of today will perpetuate the same abusive ‘cavemen’ tendencies of older generations that have marked women with an unworthy stain for the past millennium. We have to probe the type of milieu that a man who perpetuates violence in any form, is raised in. Keeping in mind, the types of attitudes or personas that, people who fabricate such aggressive attitudes propagate. It all starts with us as women and men - on how we treat each other as individuals.

Perpetrators of women to children violence, are cowards who themselves were treated with disrespect and humiliation by similar cowards – therefore see it fit to repeat the circle of abuse because, at the time of their darkest days of abusive. Their family members; aunts, uncle, mothers, fathers and siblings in their lives, chose not to ‘hear, see nor speak evil’ – thus turning a blind eye to the abusive evil that was done to them at that time. Speaking out was a taboo thing, for the victim of abuse deserved to be raped, punched and pillaged of the little dignity they have. By men who were perpetrators of abuse, men that were feared and praised by irresponsible men.

“You strike a woman, you strike a rock!" Women and children are not objects of ridicule – they are rocks that should be nurtured in rough and tough times, comforted and loved in breezy easy days - rocks that are polished to women of the future.

As much as we need responsible men to craft such rocks – Men who are: “Responsible men [that] don’t look away; they have the courage to act! Take a stand. Stop violence against women and children….” And do not encourage abuse. We as society also need responsible women that do not perpetuate abuse or harbor abusers in their closed doors. Take a stand! Say no to women and children abuse.

WORD TO A NEW REVOLUTION!

By Linda Sakazi Thwala